Jesus replied, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.”

— John 13:7

On a quick drive around town a few days ago, Becca and I stopped at church.

I missed this place, and I needed to say hello.
I hadn’t been there since I’ve returned home.

There was something sad about seeing the trees in bloom, but no one being there to soak in their beauty. They fade so quickly each year, and it feels magical to stand beneath them all! It’s a feeling that’s usually experienced by many, but this year only by few.

During this quarantine time it has been sobering, humbling, to realize how I’ve taken my community for granted in certain moments. I longed many years for this church family, and I sometimes forget that it is not the people filling me up when I interact with them, but Jesus in them. Many times it takes the absence of something to realize the depth of which it has impacted us, but also maybe reveal the unholy stature we’ve held it in. This perspective has helped to shape how I feel the Lord moving in this time. He is stripping away things that we have elevated too close, to where only He should be. Crossroads Church has helped to shape and mold me, this body has pushed me hard to grow – many times in ways I didn’t know I needed and quite frankly didn’t want to. I have been amazingly blessed by the way the Father’s heart has moved in this place. But we need communion with the Father alone to be enough, I declare that being with just Him IS enough! It’s hard, because community, friends, connection, they are all such GOOD things – but they nothing compared to being face to face with Jesus.

As the dust settles, and worldly things that have falsely given us life become inaccessible, boring and old, my prayer is this: May the Lord continue to reveal where we’ve wrongly replaced His joy, so it’s evident what we really long for is found only in Him.

I’m looking forward to the Sundays when there are friends visiting on those benches at the front of the church.
I’m looking forward to the Wednesdays when the youth group is playing volleyball on the lawn.
I’m looking forward to being able to worship collectively in the same building with my people.

There is such expectation in my heart for our return, united stronger than before, defeating the attempt of the enemy to separate. But for now we wait for Him to move in the stillness of our homes.

He waits for us to pay attention to what He’s doing in the midst of it all.

Talk to you soon!
xoxo, Rach

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